Black Friday.

For me friday is a day of pure auspicious.. its a day of divine and very calm compare with other day.. thats why i love friday alot.. But last friday it happend to be a sad day for me. My grandmother passed away on the day. After 93 years living and finally she rests in peace.. Me, mom and dad went to taiping, kamunting around morning 10.am after i went to penang airport to send my sister who is leaving to kelantan for work confrence.. she couldnt attend the funeral so left 3 of us.. 

I bought for her a big round garland as a symbol of respect.. I didnt know i would need to stay at taiping.. so i didnt bring any clothes with me.. So after i left my parents there and sit beside my grandmothers coffin for a while.. i went straight to my home in penang, the next day my aunt.. my grandmothers 2nd daughter flying from Australia to give her last respect.. so i need to fetch her from the airport.. I fetched her on saturday morning at 10am.. and reached taiping around 12:15pm.. It was rather a very somber.. sad.. and disturbing environment.. For me 3 things that i cannot take in my life no matter what.. ... 1st.. suffering.. by anyone.. 2nd.. death... 3rd.. blood. 

This 3 things will surely disturb me for days.. sometimes months.. which will cause me to be uncomfortable most of the time.. I will surely loss my appetite.. and loss my ability to be in one piece.

Well around 1.45pm.. my grandmothers body have been taken to the creamatorioum ground.. i went there to.. to perform the final rites... im her first grandson.. so i will need to be involved.. as insisted by my parents and my relatives.. my father and his 2 brothers are amonth the others who performed the final rites.....After the full hinduism rites been performed.. we came home.. taken bath... had a rather unusuall, non jovial and silent lunch.. 

As the days goes on sunday... me my father and both his brothers went again to the crematorium ground together with the function priest to collect my grandmothers bones. One could imagine the sadness.. the pain... the fear... its the moment of deja'vu..  all those clouded me just like that in seconds.. but after a while... i begin to think about it.. eventually every single person in this world has to go thru the same thing.. its a shocking experience for me.. but i manage to over come it...

After my uncle.. my grandmothers last son.. done the prayers including pour my grandmothers ash ("asthi") on the flowing river.. we head back to my grandmothers house..there again we took a shower and had a quick lunch.. before me, my parents head back to penang.. follow by other relatives heading back to their homes...

I didnt expect or even imagine in my wildest dreams that my labour day holiday.. and furthermore my favourite day.. "friday" will end up rather emotional and somber.. Well.. thats how the human life cycle is... none is imortal.. if we start to breath.. one day..eventually we will stop to breath.. For me the holiday is not important.. but its just the loved ones.. once they parted away.. the pains are speachless............... ..... ..... ........

Dedicated to my Grandmother.. Mdm.Maheswary (1916 - 2009). Om Shanti..