Wonder what is the path of light for me.. Varama ellei sabama? (translation of: is it a gift or a curse?). This few days after my fathers death, my mind is not in one place.. to be precise in peace.. i felt something larger going to happen. Is it for me? or for anyone else? Im trying my best not to think negative, but surely this is not the actual me, thinking things and imagining things relatively.. What should i do? Ive lost hope on faith this few days. Tried to stand in front of the altar closing my eyes, with a deep breath focusing on things but ive failed. Wonder what should i do. I just wish whatever it is.. not a bad ones cause im not in a state of accepting bad things right now.. Il just leave it to the time to tell.. if its a gift or a curse which awaits me....
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